Lessons from Dad: Day 2

Here’s Lessons from Dad: Day 2

1.     Work Ethic: “Go Sick”

When I was younger, I tried, like most kids, to find every possible way out of getting out of going to school. The easiest method was to exaggerate any possible feeling of sickness into something horrible, adding in a little crying and showy devastation. However, my Mom and Dad were pretty firm and it took a lot of effort to win at that game. Even on days where I really wasn’t feeling my best, their policy in most cases was simple. If you don’t have a fever and you’re not deathly contagious, you’re going. I didn’t understand it, because my own thoughts told me that if I wasn’t going to enjoy myself, putting forth extra effort was pointless. 

Perhaps because of my behavior, my mother would always tell me that my Dad had a firm policy of “go sick.” There  are still many times I see him stumble out of bed and head off to work even when he clearly felt horrible. This remains true even in his often very time consuming work as the Bishop. He always seems to just keep going and keeping working. And in most cases, his efforts are more service-oriented than anything else.

My Dad’s famous words “go sick” have stuck with me over the years, inspiring me to keep going, even through the hard times. It has helped me to push myself and reach beyond the potential that I thought I had to become something even better. I think it applies to more than just sickness, it means putting forth your best effort. My Dad is always the first one to let me know that all my efforts are sufficient and great in his eyes as long as I do the best that I can—even if “my best” means pushing my own limits. I know that if I “go sick,” then I will be satisfied with myself and able to do even more than I thought I could. It is an invaluable lesson to me.

2.      Humor:…in everything

Learning to laugh is healthy. It can break the ice in an awkward situation. It can smooth over relationships and change the perspective of a bad day into something worth remembering. I think my Dad has always been good at helping us learn to laugh. My family loves laughing—at ourselves and the often unusual circumstances in which we find ourselves. I can’t count the number of times we have gathered around the table after a meal or family scripture study and simply humorous exchanged stories from our oft-changing lives. Our conversations constantly drift from the more serious “we can change the world” discussions to laughter-filled stories that have me in tears. 

While understanding the importance of taking certain subjects seriously, my Dad can still always find a way to make things seem brighter through a good, clean joke. Whenever the home teachers come over, he has everyone feeling comfortable at once with his quick wit and easy laughter. My mom says that he’s always better and at ease in front of an audience. “Give him a microphone and a stage, and he’ll go to town with it.” Generally, my Dad isn’t incredibly outgoing, and is most vocal when discussing political matters. But humor comes easy to him, and I think it really helped our family.

There are too many humorous moments to remember and recount. But one quick example to help illustrate may be my Dad’s many phrases that have become almost cannon by now…so much that I hardly know when I’m saying one. For example, my family is often pretty slow at getting ready to leave somewhere. Everyone seems to take their time while simultaneous yelling for everyone else to hurry up. It took a long time for me to catch the full meaning of my Dad’s oft-used phrase, “Well, here we go, like a herd of turtles.” When it did finally occur to me what he meant, I couldn’t stop laughing. In his own way, he chooses to laugh at what could make him very impatient. Another one he uses when we are gathered to eat and waiting for someone to perhaps get home from a Church meeting. He’ll look at one of us with a twinkle in his eye and say, “Sure we’re going to wait for them…like one pig waits for another,” and then  proceed to bless the food and let us eat. Finally, there is a phrase he uses every time we are about to say family prayer. It’s from an old Church movie where two missionaries are asked by an investigator to pray. They respond, “No problem, Neal.” And then kneel down. My Dad thought the pun was hilarious. So, every time we pray, it goes something like this… My mom says, “Alright, time for family prayer.” And then my Dad’s, “No problem, Neal.” And we all giggle and kneel down. It’s become a sort of habit, and I often have to stop myself from saying it in public settings.

These phrases are just a little taste of how we were raised. Ultimately, we laughed at everything. I believe it really helped our family. And even now, when things go a little wrong, I can sometimes remember to just laugh about it. That is a gift and lesson taught to me by my Daddy.