Lessons from Dad: Day 1

My Dad is a hero. My hero. He’s also a retired solider of more than twenty years, one who has faced more than one deployment and seen the horrors of war. He was a chaplain, spending his work days counseling with soldiers who suffered everything from marriage struggles to PTSD. He’s also worked as a JAG officer in the Navy and a construction worker.

My Dad is the father of eight children and a devoted husband to my mom. Because of his work, I can’t say that he was always around. There have been many times where he was called away to the field for training, was deployed, or was often so tired when he did come home from work that we saw little of him before he was off to bed. But I never felt like I had an absentee father. In fact, he somehow found just enough time in just enough ways for me to hardly remember the times when he was gone. To me, my father has always been there for me when I needed. And in the spirit of Father’s Day, I thought it a good time to reflect on all the many things my father has taught me throughout the years. So, for the next five days, I will be writing down some lessons I have learned from my daddy. There will be two each day.

Here’s Lessons from Dad: Day 1

1.     Duty and Patriotism.

This one is easy and obvious. From my earliest memories, my Dad has always been a Chaplain in the Army. He is devoted beyond measure to preserving the freedom of his country. To be honest, I really never gave much thought to his choice of career. That was until 9/11, when everything in my world changed.

 We lived in South Carolina at the time. I remember watching the news broadcast that evening. My mom has already told me about the horrid events of that day, but all I understood at first was that there had been a plane crash. It wasn’t until the news starting discussing the possibilities of war that it started to sink in. I started praying that it wouldn’t happen, that we’d find a way to avoid it. But it did break out, and the first group sent was the 101^st airborn division, a group I knew well because my Dad had been a part of it when we lived in Tennessee. That meant that some of my friends’ parents would probably be going. And I feared that my Dad would soon follow.

However, almost immediately after the news, my Dad started teaching us the why of war. He’ll be the first one to tell you that war is hell. He knows it. But when I did finally admit to him that I was afraid of him never coming back if he was deployed, his memorable response was something to the effect of, “I can’t think of a better way to die than in defense of my country.”

At first, the answer likely bothered me, since it did little to quell my fears, but I have since become grateful for what it taught me. I know that I have a Dad who understands the true importance of freedom, particularly religious freedom, and absolute loyalty. If it was about faith, family, or country, he would give anything to preserve them. My Dad understands duty, and he is the perfect example of Patriotism.

2.      Heroes and Sacrifice

While somewhat similar to my last post on patriotism, there is still more to be said for heroes and sacrifice. I remember how recently I was sort of teasing my sister Kathryn for her romanticized view of war and her obsession with soldiers, even back to Robin Hood. Somewhat troubled, Kathryn said something like, “I don’t know why I love war stories about soldiers so much.” My Dad’s response was simple, “That’s easy. You like heroes.”

Any good soldier knows what it means to sacrifice. Simply leaving family for deployments is the least of their worries. There is so much that can, and often does, go against what we had hoped. So many of our noble military men and women have given the Ultimate sacrifice. All gave some, some gave all. And all are true heroes. Our family has been inspired by the stories told of those who truly were willing to give their all in defense of principles they believed in. As the scripture says, “Perfect love casteth out all fear.”

But my Dad would tell you that there are more heroes than just those on the battlefield. In Matt. 16, it says “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.”

Anyone willing to give up private goods and interests for the benefit of others—in effect, anyone who truly sacrifices for the greater good—is a hero in his eyes. I believe I once asked my Dad who his hero was, and he replied, “President Kimball was my hero.” He loves the Prophets of God. He loves those who willingly put God above everything else, even when it means sacrifice.

When my Dad retired from the military, it was his dream to move out to our property near Far West and build a home. He admires and respects the early saints and their heroic sacrifices, a passion I have also began to share. However, shortly before he officially retired, the Stake President came to visit and asked him to move to the somewhat ghetto (and more dangerous) city of Junction City, about twenty miles away from where we lived at the time, so that he could call him to be a Bishop. This effectively put my Dad’s dream on hold. But, he willingly relented. He was willing to sacrifice.

Another time, someone asked him what he would do if the Church ever came and asked for his property near Far West. His response, “I’d be happy to give it to them. I like to think that I’m just keeping it for the Church.”

My Dad knows how to sacrifice his time, energy, and dreams in pursuit of God’s kingdom. And that makes him my personal hero.